My BFF, the Extrovert
Whilst I mostly laugh and joke about the difficulties of spending my life with an Extrovert, there's no-one else I would choose to live with, for the rest of my life.
He is an incredibly caring human being, and there are many things about my Extrovert that make my life much better than it would be if I was on my own, or even with another Introvert.
It's very important to remember these, and write them down, so I can read them at times when I am feeling overwhelmed by his noise and presence!
It wasn't until we had been together for a few years that I really started to appreciate these things, and you also have to bear in mind that we were together for 14 years before I even knew that we were energy opposites! I unbelievably didn't discover I was an Introvert until I was 41 years old. Not sure how I survived in the world being as introverted as I now accept that I am - although I am fully aware that alcohol played a huge part there, which thankfully I have fully let go of these days! (you can read the start of this journey here)
There's no denying that we are still finding our way together through the different ways we like to be in the world, but we have made massive progress and found where we can (and can't!) compromise for each other. So sometimes we have to just do our own thing, which is in no way a bad thing, as it gives us space from each other (what is it they say about 'absence makes the heart grow fonder'? 😉), and the time we do spend together is so much better for being able to have our separateness without feeling like the other person is being left out.
The things that I appreciate are so small, but they mean so much.
Like the fact that as an introvert (or maybe it's just me!), I find it particularly hard to get served at bars. I'm not pushy enough to be noticed in reality - in fact, it was a joke amongst my friends before I met my Extrovert.
My friends were convinced I just didn't want to go buy a round, but I kept trying to explain that I could be completely ignored for days up there - I would even demonstrate to prove my point. But that just made it worse, as they thought it was hilarious, and would place bets on how long it would take til eventually no-one else needed served, and then the bar staff would finally recognise my existence in the same dimension. By which time my so-called friends would be shouting to me to get a double round as I'd taken so damn long!
And when my Extrovert wants to be 'doing things' at the weekend, and I need complete rest from the 'doing things' when I've already been doing things all week, we will often agree that he go sweat for hours in the garden (whereas I'd probably choose to work an extra couple of hours in an office, and pay a gardener, if it was my responsibility), and I will sit on our deck with a coffee and write this blog, or my journal, or read the latest fantasy novel that is 'my research' (for my own book that I've been writing since 2016...).
We find new things all the time - like when it comes to doing all of our household bills, I'm happy to sit on the deck (yes, I do spend a lot of time there...) and create a new Excel spreadsheet and make sure everything gets done on time, for the right price, and he likes to get up super early at the weekend and get the fruit and veg and have a chat to everyone he meets at the market.
Although he doesn't like how good I am at my job as Queen of Coin sometimes, as he can't buy me a 'surprise' anything, because the money has barely left our bank account, and I'm like an FBI agent when I don't recognise the purchase!
makes encourages 😉 me to do stuff..
So many events and places I would never have been or seen if I didn't have my Extrovert egging me on from the sidelines. I'm going to save those for another blog, as there are so many funny stories, and this is supposed to be a lovely message to my soulmate.
It feels appropriate that I finished writing this on Valentines Day, because although we are both very cynical about these commercialised events, and I prefer we choose to show our love for each other every day of the year, I do always like to do a little gesture to show him I'm always thinking of him 🥰.
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